Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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