Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
