U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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