I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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