Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
