Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
It was like getting head from an anaconda
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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