so explain again why im purple
no
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
