Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
You slammed your forties down on the table and yelled "I AM EDWARD FORTYHANDS" then mumbled something about repping Idaho like a champ and laid down on the couch.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
