i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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