tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
