There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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