ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
