fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Randomize