these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize