You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
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Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
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I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
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