Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Randomize