Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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