new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
