He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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