It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
