Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize