My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize