I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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