used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
