After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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