But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
