So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
