She is in my trunk
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
