She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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