I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
