i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.