Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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