I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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