There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
