what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Randomize
