How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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