We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize