So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
