He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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