He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
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no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
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There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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