Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
