he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
He's a Shit stain on my heart
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Randomize
