Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
