My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Randomize
