dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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