Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Randomize