Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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