Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
