I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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