why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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